Blogging has been postponed

Hello 2019, hello everyone – I think you may have forgotten about me because I’ve certainly forgotten about you. Blogging has been pushed back for months now, I have completely lost interest in writing which breaks my heart.

I am working two jobs, rehearsals every Monday (sometimes twice a week inc Sunday), a personal trainer, the gym, a book club. I am doing FAR TOO MUCH and it’s too overwhelming. I don’t even have time to sell my life on eBay which I need to do. I miss reading, I miss watching Netflix, I miss spending time with my friends – I MISS A LIFE.

For those that know, I’m trying to save for a house so I am working round the clock to make this happen. Unfortunately I am miles off from the deposit and really concerned it’ll take me a life time to get there. Here’s where I suggest that if you’re young enough get saving now. Please don’t leave it until you’re 25 and sat there staring at other people’s success whilst drowning in overtime at work.

Blogging will always be in my top 10 favourite things to do so I won’t be giving it up yet at all. I’m still going to be around and I’ll be thinking of things to write about.

I will get back into this – onwards and upwards.


I have taken a break from blogging

I have had to take a small break from blogging because I have some personal things going on at the moment. Unfortunately the doctors have found something unusual and I need to undergo further tests to see what it is. As much as I love to blog, my health comes first and that’s what I am focusing on at the moment.

I’ll be back as soon as I can but I know you’ll all respect my decision. Thank you x

Top 15 things I have never done

So I thought I would write something a little different this time by actually talking about my self and things that I haven’t done. When you read through this list you might be as shocked as me that I’ve not done half the things everyone else has done. I would also be very interested in your I have nevers.

I have never:

  • Been on a sunbed
  • Had my hair dyed in a salon
  • Had false nails
  • Travelled to America
  • Held a snake or been near one
  • Known how to put make-up on correctly
  • Ordered a steak at a restaurant / pub / anywhere
  • Had the flu
  • Killed an animal whilst driving (although I nearly did today)
  • Had any driving incidences (cursed myself probably)
  • Visited Ireland
  • Been stung by a bee / wasp
  • Decorated any room
  • Taken any illegal drugs
  • Been arrested or in trouble with the police

I think my list is quite generic but some people are often shocked that I haven’t ever ordered a steak before.

Please let me know what your top 15 things are. I know I definitely have more but the list would go on and on!

Why am I feeling lonely?

To be honest I am not quite sure why I am writing this post because there’s no reason for me to feel lonely. I have a boyfriend, I live with my incredible family and I have lots of different friends but right now I feel sad about being lonely – weird.

My friends do a hell of a lot for me so I cannot say they’re not there. They are. If I needed to call one of them about something, they’d answer and they’d listen. They wouldn’t care if it’s a boring story or if they’ve heard something similar before, they’d sit and get earache for me. Thank you guys.

In my mind I think I may know why I’m sad a little. Everyone I know has moved on with their lives like we’re all supposed to do but I haven’t changed. I don’t care that I’m not engaged or having a baby as I’m nowhere near ready for that but they’re moving forward and moving on…moving on from being in my life all of the time. I sound like a jealous ex but it’s because I value people’s friendships and I’m sad when they deteriorate. I’m sure you’ve probably felt the same at some point.

I’d say because I’m still living at home I’m wanting to go out with people, wanting to explore what I can and I know when I officially become an adult I’ll be like one of you. It’s kinda scary. I don’t want to be alone or feel alone.

Maybe I need to realise that being nearly 25 means everything changes. People change, the environment changes and friends change I guess (I am not ditching anyone). It’s life but I won’t accept it.

What I want for my future

I want what every other blogger wants, I want to write full-time. I want to be able to create engaging content and to work with endless brands because writing makes me really happy. There’s just one problem, how can you go from a full time position to a ‘I don’t know what’s going to happen to me next month‘ position. Every full-time job guarantees you a monthly income whereas becoming freelance is a risk taker.

I have always been a bit of a risk taker with my career and choices but right now I haven’t got the balls to just quit my job. I mean I am in a great position to do so because I still live at home so now is the time to take these chances but I am terrified.

How did you become a full time freelancer? I haven’t worked with many brands as you will see on my blog but that’s what my aim is. I won’t pretend I am happy working with a brand if I’m never going to use the product.

Please send me some advice xox

Is doing too much damaging my body?

My life is up and down at the moment because of my health. One day I’m fine and the next my joints feel like they might snap or my mind thinks I haven’t slept for days. It definitely is a weird one and I never know how to describe it when someone asks but my problem is I have taken too much on and it’s making me ill.

What do I do each week?

As I’ve mentioned before I am in a theatre group on a Monday evening, I work Monday to Friday 08:30 – 5pm, I’m learning to play the ukulele, I also work for Avon and have many customers across my town, I’ve joined the gym this week (been twice so far) and finally I have to squeeze Michael (boyfriend) into my ridiculous schedule. I rarely have time to see my friends because I dedicate my time elsewhere and never think of myself.

Being bored is a huge thing I try to avoid. I am not one for staying it, it absolutely infuriates me because it’s such a waste of life however how much is too much? Well at the moment I certainly think it’s too much and I’m disappointed with myself that I’ve sacked off reading books and blogging. It’s kind of like you forget what is important to you but going to theatre and the gym makes me forget about the stress at work. These are my places to zone out and be free.

What’s happened?

I am just an idiot that doesn’t plan days very well but I used to be extremely good with this but since working full-time I feel like I’ve flopped on everything. Blogging and reading was always my number one thing when I was working part-time (plus Michael) and I was so excited to keep doing it. Ideas would pop into my head and I would interact more with the blogging community but I just don’t anymore.

My friends haven’t seen me in weeks because I just don’t have the time or if I have a night free, I just want to be alone. My next trip away is next weekend in Wales with the besties so that’ll give me a chance to chill out and rethink what’s right for me.

Do you take to much on? How do you deal with it?

Derby Bloggers Brunch

It was my first time ever attending a bloggers meet up because I either live to far away or I’ve got other plans. Derby is around 30 minutes away from me so it’s not too bad to get to. Anyway I’d never met any of the girls that were attending, I’ve only ever tweeted some of them so I was dreading putting names to faces.

One of the many reasons I was looking forward to going was to see an old secondary school bestie of mine. I didn’t know Vanessa had her own blog until I came across her Instagram post and told her to get on Twitter!

Monét put a group together on Twitter so we could all have a little chat before hand and I added Vanessa to the group. This made talking to people a bit easier because some of us were/are strangers to one another. I’m so pleased she was able to come along! I’m so pleased I was able to attend as I was unsure about whether to go or not. Purely for the fact that I do not blog very often and mines a little basic compared to others.

We were late, I missed my train (not happy) and then we had to find our way to Severn restaurant which by the way is BEAUTIFUL! It was daunting walking through those doors because you don’t know what sort of reaction you’ll get when you first walk up to the table. Neither of us knew anyone. I didn’t recognise many faces (sorry) and they probably didn’t recognise me because I’m a fraudster, I don’t wear glasses on my pictures. Hehe.

After we sat down and settled in we got speaking to at least half of the table (sorry I didn’t speak to the other side, the table was very long) and they were all so so friendly. I couldn’t have asked for a nicer bunch of people to spend my first ever poached egg in a restaurant experience with! We all ended up speaking about so many different things but to be honest I think I just waffled on about so much crap. Again, sorry!

I’m looking forward to attending the next #DerbyBloggersBrunch and getting to know these ladies more. I hope to carry on tweeting everyone like I always do and hopefully I can make some really good friends from this.

Thank you to Monét for organising it, Severn restaurant for hosting it with such incredible tasting food and the girls for attending. See you all again soon! Muchos gracias.