How does it feel turning 25?

So my 25th birthday was approaching and it was the day I was dreading. The day when you can no longer tick 18-24 boxes, you’re in your mid twenties and what you’re 25 and still live at home? Happy 2nd February for me! It is daunting because I always said I would probably have children by the time I was 25 – oh how I laugh at myself now. That’s not going to happen any time soon as I feel like I still have so much to do in my life before I can no longer be selfish. When I say selfish, I mean an adult.

There are quite a few negatives to being 25 (mainly the tick boxes issue) but let’s look at the positives.

I have always wanted afternoon tea because it is more sophisticated and ‘grown up’ so that’s what I decided to do. I absolutely loved afternoon tea at the Lakeside Bistro and it was only £13.95 each! It was nice to do something completely different and the food tasted great minus the egg sandwiches. It was a shame the table was set out in a line because it made it quite difficult speaking to people. So apologies if I didn’t get to speak to you that much!

What are the bonuses of being 25?

  • I’m no longer classed as a young driver so my insurance should hopefully drop for the summer!
  • People take you more seriously, you’ve got a few years of experience behind you so you can tackle things.
  • Your friends are starting to get married – weddings galore yay!
  • It is okay to stay in and watch Netflix because you can’t handle it like you used to.

I am struggling to think of more so if you’ve turned 25 what have been your highlights?

When you’re feeling inspired by others

Recently I have taken a little more time to sit back and read people’s blog posts rather than sitting here waiting for people to read mine. From this it has given me a positive outlook on what I need to do to benefit myself. Yes it has been a tricky few months for me as you will have seen in previous posts but it is time to turn that around and learn from it.

So far I have two weekends away planned, I’ve finally got weddings to go to as well and not just one, I have three (one I’m a bridesmaid)!! This year I am aiming to go camping a little bit more as it is a fantastic escape route even when it is raining.

I would love to move out – sorry parents but it is time I got my own space so I can decorate it with things I will stare at but will never use. I keep thinking I want to move to a city, probably Nottingham in the end but right now I am going to stay put. The thought of moving out scares me a little but it’s also an exciting adventure and it’s my adventure. There are always a lot of pressures for people in there 20s as Tiffany has pointed out in her recent post and it’s true. I have been in my relationship for four and a half years but so many things have happened during our relationship that has made it impossible for us to live together.

People’s progression through life whether that is work related, adult life related or even a trip abroad has inspired me to look for more. It is often I settle for what’s around me and I shouldn’t. Seeing people travel here there and everywhere makes me want to do the same thing but I stop myself. Why? I think it’s because I fear change and don’t feel like I could adapt in a new job right now. Plus I don’t have any savings anymore thanks to my lovely Kia Ceed car!

I have finally gone back to the gym after kicking myself off my bed! I am so pleased I’m getting back into it and I won’t give up like I have given up with everything else. Here is to a much brighter 2018 and one filled with positivity!

How is your 2018 going so far?

My resolutions for 2018

2017 was a pretty crazy year for me with ups and downs every week. I can’t say I did anything outstanding (I actually bought my own car) but I took a few trips here and there and slept in a tent through Storm Brian! It was a fun year, I got to attend my first blogging event which was brilliant as I have met so many wonderful people from it. The list could go on about what I did last year but it’s time to focus on what is happening now.

For this year I want big things to happen for me and when I say big things, I mean adult things! So what are they?

  • It’s time to move out so renting will 100% be the answer to this
  • Renew my National Trust membership and make the most of it
  • Giving up alcohol until January 1st 2019
  • Lose weight (every year)
  • Camp a few weekends over the summer (two trips booked so far)
  • Meet more friends using the Bumble app
  • Socialise a lot more
  • Taking trips to cities as I don’t explore them enough
  • Learn to play my ukulele
  • Improve my French
  • Read and review lots of books (Goodreads target is 25)

There are probably more to think of but I guess these are maybe seen as goals rather than resolutions. I am quite excited for what this year has to offer and I will be becoming more organised to achieve it all. No more sitting around staring at a blank TV, let’s get my act together and do this!

What are your plans for this year? 

Why am I feeling lonely?

To be honest I am not quite sure why I am writing this post because there’s no reason for me to feel lonely. I have a boyfriend, I live with my incredible family and I have lots of different friends but right now I feel sad about being lonely – weird.

My friends do a hell of a lot for me so I cannot say they’re not there. They are. If I needed to call one of them about something, they’d answer and they’d listen. They wouldn’t care if it’s a boring story or if they’ve heard something similar before, they’d sit and get earache for me. Thank you guys.

In my mind I think I may know why I’m sad a little. Everyone I know has moved on with their lives like we’re all supposed to do but I haven’t changed. I don’t care that I’m not engaged or having a baby as I’m nowhere near ready for that but they’re moving forward and moving on…moving on from being in my life all of the time. I sound like a jealous ex but it’s because I value people’s friendships and I’m sad when they deteriorate. I’m sure you’ve probably felt the same at some point.

I’d say because I’m still living at home I’m wanting to go out with people, wanting to explore what I can and I know when I officially become an adult I’ll be like one of you. It’s kinda scary. I don’t want to be alone or feel alone.

Maybe I need to realise that being nearly 25 means everything changes. People change, the environment changes and friends change I guess (I am not ditching anyone). It’s life but I won’t accept it.

I am sorry for being quiet

Quite recently I have taken a step back from blogging and communicating with bloggers on Twitter. You are probably wondering why or you might not care but I know I am not well. A lot of things have been going on at work recently and my dentist has told me I am suffering from anxiety. People have said to me well how does your dentist know? Well I am chewing the insides of my mouth constantly and causing my teeth problems. I am also grinding my teeth and the pain from biting all day is unbearable.

I won’t go into what has happened because I don’t know if people from work will read my blog. To be honest I hope they never do but you never know how much stalking people get up to.

It is a really difficult time for me at the moment and the constant crying at home has gotten out of hand. I promise I will be back but I just need some me time and to try and figure out what’s best for me.

If you’ve ever been in my situation, how did you manage?

Taking up a new hobby

I already snow myself under with absolutely everything. My blog is a hobby, I am in a theatre group on Monday’s, I read a lot, I Netflix most of the time, I do Avon after work and now I am considering taking up the ukulele. It is rather random but I am currently following one on Shpock and it looks so cute and I need it in my life.

Although I am so predictable. I joined the National Trust so I can go out and explore more and I have used it once since April – what an idiot. I know if I buy this I will attempt to play it probably for the first week and then it’ll gather dust. I am beyond predictable but I absolutely adore music. Do I buy it and just risk it?! To be honest I should just put a schedule together and then I might actually stick to something in my life.

One thing that is preventing me from snapping up the deal is my concerns about my joint hypermobility. My fingers are easily affected by over usage hence why I have always avoided the guitar. I don’t really fancy making it worse as it is coming up to winter and I will be crying like a baby.

I would love some feedback on your experiences with a ukulele please (if you have any). Do you enjoy playing it? When did you start playing it? Have you ever thought about playing it?

I think I’m suffering from stress

So within the last two months my team at work has gone from three to one. Who’s the one? Yup, me. I am now doing three people’s job roles and there’s only one of me and I come with two hands and one brain. It was the day I was dreading to be left all alone and now I think I’m suffering from stress because of it. The funny thing is that I only started in January and now I am looking after Marketing.

My colleague left nearly two weeks ago and she dealt with the social media and the press releases. Yes this is easy to do, I know that but I’m responsible for so much more and after what has happened today, I would just like to walk out. Obviously I can’t because I need a job and marketing jobs don’t come up often where I live.

I love what I do, I feel I have developed many skills and still have a lot to learn but handling all of this at 24 on my own is an absolute nightmare. Last Friday I had a small nosebleed at work – 100% think it is stress related. My moods are any how, I have good days and today I have had a bad day hence why I am reflecting on life. Headaches, dizzy spells, teary eyes, severe tiredness, can’t talk about work without getting upset – is this even normal?

We are currently recruiting for someone to come and help me but it could take up to two months. TWO MONTHS?! Who waits that long, I certainly can’t handle that. My meeting with the MD went well yesterday as I felt positive and on top of things but when you’re the only one in the Marketing Department, you are the one getting bombarded with emails and requests. Yay for me!

I think what bothers me is I don’t have someone to say ‘oh would you mind dealing with this please?’ No-one to fob anything off to or answer the phone whilst you’re trying to do something. I have such an array of things to do and I like making lists, ticking off the things I have done and then adding more. Those things are not a problem for me, I go into major panic mode when all of a sudden everything goes wrong and someone wants you here, there and then somewhere else.

If only we were able to pause time and make the surroundings just stop for a minute. If anyone is called Bernard and you have a watch, hit me up please.